We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature--trees, flowers, grass--grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence...We need silence to be able to touch souls. --Mother Teresa

Thursday, September 23, 2010

A Real Game

So this came in an email to me.....and since I laughed out loud....I thought you might laugh out loud, too.

________________________________



THE 
NEXT SURVIVOR
SERIES 
Six married men 
will be dropped on an island 
with one car 
and 3 kids each 
for six weeks. 

Each kid will play two sports 
and take either music or dance classes. 

There is no fast food.

Each man must 
take care of his 3 kids; maintain his career,
keep his assigned house clean
correct all homework, 
complete science projects, 
cook
do laundry, 
and pay a list of 'pretend' bills 
with not enough money. 

In addition, 
each man 
will have to budget enough money 
for groceries each week. 

Each man 
must remember the birthdays 
of all their friends and relatives
and send cards out on time--no emailing. 

Each man must also take each child 
to a doctor's appointment
a dentist appointment 
and a haircut appointment.

He must make one unscheduled and 
inconvenient visit per child to the Emergency Room.

He must also make cookies or cupcakes 
for a school function.

Each man will be responsible for 
decorating his own assigned house, 
planting flowers outside, and keeping it 
presentable at all times.

The men will only have access to television 
when the kids are asleep and all chores are done. 

The men must shave their legs

wear makeup daily

adorn themselves with jewelry, 

wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes

keep fingernails polished, 

and eyebrows groomed 

During one of the six weeks

the men will have to endure severe 
abdominal cramps, backaches, headaches,
have extreme, unexplained mood swings 
but never once complain or slow down 
from other duties. 

They must attend weekly school meetings 
and church, 
and find time at least once to spend 
the afternoon at the park or a similar 
setting.


They will need to read a book to the kids each night 
and in the morning, 
feed them, 
dress them
brush their teeth and 
comb their hair 
by 7:30 am.


A test will be given 
at the end of the six weeks, 
and each father will be required to know 
all of the following information: 
each child's 
birthday, 
height, weight,
shoe size, clothes size, 
doctor's name, 
the child's weight at birth, 
length, time of birth, 
and length of labor, 
each child's favorite color, 
middle name, 
favorite snack, 
favorite song, 
favorite drink, 
favorite toy, 
biggest fear, 
and what they want to be when they grow up.

The kids vote them off the island based on performance. 

The last man wins only if...
he still 
has enough energy 
to be intimate with his spouse 
at a moment's notice.


If the last man does win, 
he can play the game over and over and over 
again for the next 18-25 years, 
eventually earning the right 
to be called Mother! 


After you get done laughing,
send this to as many females as 
you think will get a kick out of it and 
as many men as you think can handle it. 
Just don't send it back to me.... 

I'm going to bed.

3 comments:

Jill said...

I love this. Can I steal it?

Hays Family 5 said...

Steal away, Sisterfriend!

Mary said...

I don't think any of them would last very long, would they? :D


Your own soul is nourished when you are kind, but you destroy yourself when you are cruel. -Proverbs 11: 17