1. There's a wrong way to mow?
2. Sometimes hair grows in mysterious places.
3. Yelling at the TV during a sporting event seems to make the players play better. Except in golf. All must be whispered.
4. There will be burping and farting.
5. Will. Do. Anything. For. Homemade. Cookies.
6. There seems to be some sort of special relationship bond with shoes--none can be gotten rid of for any reason.
7. His offspring will act like him at the most opportune of moments. (See number 4)
8. Do not schedule anything (like weddings, baptisms, birthday parties, birth of children) during major sporting events like the World Series, the Superbowl or the Final Four.
9. Will eat anything. Once.
10. Carefully wording requests while serving his favorite cookies will get the request accomplished much more quickly.
11. If he's ever wrong, be careful how you point it out to him. See number 5.
12. When you marry your best friend, you can overlook all of these things because he can make a list with double the number of things his mother forgot to mention about women. Just sayin'.