1. If it sounds like a fart, and it smells like a fart, it's a fart.
2. I hate winter.
3. I really like warm starch with melted dairy.
4. Christmas break 2009 is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too short.
5. I never want to see ham again. Who thought a 20 pound ham would be just enough for 8 people?
6. What goes up must come down. Dang Christmas treeS.
7. Shopping is the stupidest sport ever invented.
8. Coffee and a newspaper is a great way to start my day. If my children are still sleeping...even better.
9. Cancer stinks eggs.
10. Laughing out loud is good for the soul. Belly laughing until you cry...priceless. Just sayin'.